Doubt

Maybe it’s the weather. Maybe it’s too much unreasonable-deadline-driven work and not enough play. And not enough exercise. Maybe it’s blowing the new eating plan for a few days. Maybe it’s seeing the number on the Evil Scale creep back up.

Maybe it’s all of the above. Today I am filled with doubt on riding the century in three weeks. Oh, I’m sure I’ll be able to do it. Mostly sure. I want to do it reasonably well. And enjoy it.

For months my goal has been to get ‘r done in no more than seven hours, including rest stops. Seven hours isn’t looking so attainable right now. Reasonably well isn’t looking so attainable right now. For perspective, last fall I rode a century in eight and a half hours. On a heavy hybrid bike. This year I will be riding an actual, significantly lighter, road bike. Still, seven hours isn’t looking too attainable. Never mind enjoying the ride.

I am tired of the rainy weather. I know we need it, but I wish it would just pour and be done with it already. Alternative: stationary bike at the health club.

I am tired of work. Don’t get me wrong, I love my job. But the entire team is burned out due to deadlines we had no say in creating. I crashed and burned a couple weeks ago. Since then three others. Maybe there’s a bug going around, but I’m seeing exhaustion all around. At least most of the pressure will be off by the end of the month. I hope. Alternative: there really isn’t any, other than try to keep balance between work and life.

I have not done much exercising at all. I had to work over the weekend, but I did manage to eek out a six-mile ride in 25 minutes yesterday, when weather allowed. (It was later afternoon, so work I gave the finger to.) I used to head to the on-site health club at work over lunch for a swim or cycle class. Office politics suggest to me it is better I don’t for the time being. Alternative: go to the home club. Love to, but my long commute and bus schedule mean I get home late. OK, I am using that as an excuse, but time is a real barrier to navigate around.

Last piece of cake eatenAfter two or three days I already went off my new meal plan. We had a birthday in the house, so I had to have cake. The birthday meal was great. But working out the nutritional information was too difficult, so I skipped tracking the entire day. I tried getting back on track, but failed there. I even finished off the final piece of birthday cake, just to get rid of it. Alternative: tomorrow is another day to try again.

Much as I feel beat down right now, the final alternative is perhaps the best: tomorrow is another day to try again.

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Shoes

Shoes that won't stay tied

Shoes that won't stay tied

I have a pair of shoes I do not like to wear. They look fine enough, and they weigh considerably less than either of the pairs I regularly wear now. But I do not like them because they will not stay tied. I can even double-knot them, and they will still come untied.

My children, as many children do, often need to be told to do this and reminded to do that. On more trying days, they need to be told and reminded more than once. Sometimes many times. Frustrating. Like shoes that won’t stay tied.

I have another pair of shoes that I wear more frequently. Until now. They are in for repair, because the soles started coming unglued and separating. Not very attractive.

Sometimes I get angry when my children misbehave. It’s not pretty when I come unglued.

April fool

Today is April Fools’ Day, the day famous for pranks. Much of it felt like I was on the receiving end of prank after prank. If only Alan Funt would have come out from hiding to announce, “Smile, you’re on Candid Camera.” In the end, probably good he didn’t. He’s been dead for 12 years, 6 months, 27 days. Perhaps his son, Peter, could have stepped in.

The day started with a chilly, dreary morning. It was supposed to be bright, at at least partly sunny, and not so cold. Ah, April 1, you got me.

The children were misbehaving, and uncooperative in getting ready for church. Pranked again.

We arrived at church, only to discover today is Palm Sunday. We didn’t expect it until next week. Very clever; we never saw it coming.

I was expecting to join a group bike ride this afternoon at 1:00. It was canceled shortly after 11:00: too cold. I checked the temperature. 46°F, though the forecast claimed it was supposed to be hi 50s, and hit 60° by noon. We didn’t hit 60° until mid-afternoon. April 1, how sneaky of you to reuse the day’s first prank.

Instead of the bike ride, the whole family went kite flying at a nearby park. It was sunny and warm enough by then to go ride bike. But I decided it would be better to go kite flying with the family. Three kites, and none of them would stay up in the air for longer than a minute. As my wife said, now we know why you would tell someone you are mad at to go fly a kite, because it’s an exercise in frustration. It was little consolation that other families at the park had the same kite prank played on them.

I could have gone bike riding on my own after that. It was warm enough, but sunset planned to cut the ride way too short. I could have gone for a short ride. But by then I felt too defeated by the day’s pranks. April 1, you win.

It is now the end of the day. Mr. Funt don’t bother popping out now, or this April fool might prank you.